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2001-11-24

ugh, I am feeling pretty crappy today.

I wrote a nice long entry earlier and then I got really into searching for a link for the beatles album rock and roll music and something on the site crashed my computer and I lost everything. bleah.

So as usual what I write now will not have the excitement and VIM of the earlier entry(damn, I love that word VIM. I need to try to work it in more often)

Shorter form:

spent a lot of the day in ZEPMANIA! watching the movie and listening to records and reading the book that the offthehookboy got me for my birthday last year, and searching the internet for the bitchen black light ZEP poster I had in high school. It was the dude in the cape from the song remains the same with the rainbow sword and lantern. IT was awesome, and I could not find it anywhere. I was in the mania enough that I would have paid top dollar for it had I found it, but no luck. I did find the perfect xmas gift for my faveboy though, in order to continue my tradition of giving him perfect gifts which make him think about how no one understands him like I do. Ahem.

I also got a postcard from my exsweetheart which was pretty manic and bizarre, but still left me with a feeling of wistful sweetness inside. Sigh.

So after all the zepmania my former guitarist/thanksgiving host picked me up and we went to his place and had coffee and cigarettes and cleaned to the sounds of MACE. And we talked about things we did together 5 and 6 years ago, and I was feeling really comfortable and happy with this cute stoner boy I have known for a very long time. We sat on the little love seat and ate the rest of the pie out of the pan and smoked cigarettes and talked and touched each other sometimes, and I was thinking about kissing him but I was also breaking out into random coughing fits every couple of minutes, so I thought it wouldn't be a good time. So we watched some movies and then my ladies came to get me and we went to see the Fine Arts Department at the Warhol. Where the nostalgia really hit, because they reminded me so much of the Scratch Poets who I used to hang with years and years ago, way back before it was really cool for white girls to get into rap music. But I knew Christian and I knew Khalil and they were so damn sweet to me, and they would shout out their truths like it was the end of the world. That is how Akil was last night, really really givin it up until even the uptight whities in the audience had to at least bop their heads. And we get to see them again next week! yipyipyip.

After they did their thing we went to the goose and it was a bad bad scene---there was one guy I did not want to talk to and no one I really did want to talk to(or the other ladies) and so we left after one beer. Went to hotel melwood to see what was going on and found the traditional day after thanksgiving scrabble game, briging on the nostalgia again for last year's thanksgiving stay at hotel melwood. And then someone handed me the TINY LITTLE HELP scrapbook, and I was hit with all the memories of days gone by. Lordy, it weren't nothing but a weepfest for me. I started to feel a little sick and so we left and I came home and got into my beddybye, and was awakened at some point in the night by a drunken houseguest who walked into my room. I am assuming he was so drunk that he forgot what floor he was on, but I was PRETTY DAMN PISSED OFF about it. Don't like drunk people stumbling into my room in the night.

Today I am doing the nostalgia thing all over again, with the videos and the poetry books and the photographs and the memories.

Sigh.

Now it's time to do the nap thing followed possibly by the grocery and laundry thing, or possibly not. Depends on how I feel when I wake up.

Right now I am wondering what to do with all these goofy feelings for this friend I have known forever and a day. Sometimes you just look at someone you have been looking at for years and you suddenly think "Hmmmmmm.............."

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