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****UPDATE****** COOLIO DID WIN!! HOORAH! I feel much more wholly integrated as a personality now. Thank you. read on. I am definitely not going to be able to get to sleep tonight. I NEED TO KNOW. I NEED TO KNOW who won the Celebrity Fear Factor. More specifically, I need to know that Coolio beat Donny Osmond. I mean, shit. I know they are real people and everything with lives and motivations and all that but for me, the battle for supremacy between Coolio and Donny Osmond is a freakin FREUDIAN NIGHTMARE JOURNEY through my subconscious. I could not believe they were showing that stuff on television.. I was innocently doing my laundry and got totally sucked in. Coolio, man, he got like 17 out of a possible 20 flags off the top of the moving bus. He actually had 19 but two of them he got before the horn sounded so he did not get credit for them. Donny only got something like 5 flags. David freakin Hasselhoff didnt even get 3 and he did a lot of moaning and grunting and gripping on to the bus for dear life. They were about to submerge Donny in the torture chamber lucite box full of worms, scorpions and some other crawly awful thing when some stupid uptight lady asked the attendant to change the channel to some military courtroom drama. I was so PISSED!!! After finishing my laundry I had dinner at Arby's with my highschool buddy so we could catch up on each other's lives. I could not stop thinking about COOLIO VERSUS DONNY though. The minute I got home I scoured the internet but no results are on line. OH ME OH MY!!! I dont know what to do. I know all my TV friends were otherwise occupied on a Tuesday night so there isn't anyone I can call. I have to know. I wanted to dye my hair tonight but I can't. I need to get me some syrup and get to bed. Some notes from the gender wars: 1--we are doing the age old dance. I take a tiny step forward. He takes a giant leap back. I take a medium sized step back. He takes a walloping leap forward. Sigh. I am going to do everything in my power to intensify our relationship while simultaneously telling you about the other person I want to be in a relationship with. This is crazy making behavior people. I am too busy for this. 2--doing a good job of not thinking too much about him. Then again, I have not seen him in a week. That will change and then things will change I am fairly certain. 3--gives me good advice about how I need to cut loose #2, how I am functioning as a bungee cord in his life and giving him all this unconditional non demanding love and support to fall back on without getting what I want. Funny thing is, I function exactly the same in his life, enabling him to stay in a love and sexless marriage by always being there to bolster his ego and tell him he is great and deserves better and allowing him an active fantasy sexlife. Elsewhere, boys are not behaving much better. Who was it that once said boys versus girls in the world series of love? |
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