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Links LUPEC |
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The number one reason to have a husband with whom you share traditional gender roles: TRASH DAY. As I had another one of my spectacular tumbles into the middle of the street two days ago, my mobility is somewhat comprimised. (it wasn't a particularly bad fall, and I am suffering way more from a skinned right knee than a slightly puffy left ankle) Last night in post-catering, laying on the couch reading Jeffery Steingarten bliss, I completely forgot about trash day. This morning as I heard the trucks pull up and take away all the neighbors trash, I was momentarily wishing I had a husband who I could order to go downstairs and take all the trash to the curb because I do all the cooking and cleaning and shopping and it is his JOB. I knew there was no way that in my gimpy state I could rustle up the trash and take it down the rickety back steps and out to the curb before the men were done. So it's another week of trying to cram all the trash unobtrusively into the corner of the porch(the corner between my neighbor's broken major appliance collection and my collection of coolers)and hoping it doesn't smell too bad before next week. Sigh. Another good use of a husband would be going downstairs and asking the new downstairs neighbor for permission to go into the basement and read the gas meter. As time has gone on, I have come to understand that the new downstairs neighbor is a young gangsta type who smokes alot of weed, has at least one young child, and will not even aknowledge me when I say hello as I pass him on the sidewalk. I also got my first piece of court-related mail addressed to him in my mailbox--I don't know if my mailcarrier is trying to subtly warn me or what, but I always seem to get the court related mail for all of my neighbors. Yes friends, I have gotten court related mail in my box addressed to every single other person who even sometimes lives in the other three units in my building. Sometimes this does make me feel a little vulnerable, but I LOVE my apartment and I have done so much work on it that I can not imagine trying to move at this point. Not to mention the fact that it would be somewhat difficult to convince a landlord to rent to me what with the complete lack of any regular income. But if I was to move, you better believe I would be moving to someplace on the first floor. With conveniently located trash cans. Amen. |
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